Haruno's Anatomy
by Kashi-Got-Swagz
Summary: Yes. This is what you think it is. A Naruto version of Grey's Anatomy. Need I say more? Will be featuring almost all of the main characters. Even if you don't watch Grey's, you most certainly can read and enjoy! Slightly AU (ages and references), and will be featuring OC's.
1. A Hard Day's Night - Part 1

_I do not own Naruto or Grey's Anatomy._

 _All rights go to Masashi Kishimoto and Shonda Rhimes._

A Hard Day's Night - Part 1

* * *

 _"The game: They say a person either has what it takes to play or they don't. My mother was one of the greats. Me, on the other hand? I'm kind of screwed."_

Her eyes snapped open as she jolted herself awake. Bad dream? Oh, kami, I'm naked. Not a dream! Not a dream! She leans over the couch and drags the blanket off the butt of the naked man on the floor and wraps it around her small frame. She then grabs a throw pillow and tosses it on said butt, covering its pale glow.

The man opens his eyes slowly and grunts. He pulls a piece of lingerie from the wooden floor and holds it up. "This is, uh—"

"-Humiliating on so many levels," she finishes as she snatches the piece from his fingertips. "You have to go."

He sits up. "Why don't you come back here, and we'll pick up where we left off?"

She finds the man's pants after wandering around for a bit. "No, seriously. You have to go. I'm late." She throws him the pants. "Which isn't what you want to be on your first day of work, so…"

"So, uh, you actually live here," he states matter-of-factly.

"No." She tucks some hair behind her ear.

"Oh."

"Yes. Kind of."

"Oh. It's nice." He jostles the pants on his legs and works the belt. "A little dusty, but it's nice."

She says nothing.

Chuckling awkwardly, he babbles, "so, how do you "kind of" live here?"

"I moved two weeks ago from Iwa, it was my mother's house, I'm selling it," she rambles out.

"Oh, I'm sorry." His hands on his hips.

"For what?"

"You said ''was.''"

She waves her hand. "Oh, my mother's not dead. She's...you know what? We don't have to do the thing."

"Oh, we can do anything you want." He leans over to grab his shirt from another part of the floor.

"No, the thing: exchange the details—pretend we care."

He smiles at her as he buttons up his shirt.

"I'm gonna go take a shower, and when I get back down here, you won't be here, so, um goodbye, um..?" Kami, she doesn't even know his name.

"Kakashi." He sticks his hand out toward her.

She grabs it and smiles awkwardly. "Kakashi…right, um, Sakura."

"Sakura?" He's wearing the world's biggest grin.

"Yeah." His smile is contagious and it breaks her seriousness. "Mhm." She backs away from the man who is basically a stranger.

"Nice meeting you." Smile never wavering.

"Bye, Kakashi." She giggles and runs up the stairs.

* * *

"Each of you comes here today hopeful, wanting in on the game. A month ago, you were in med school being taught by doctors."

The man opens the door one of the Operation Rooms and flips on the lights. "Today you are the doctors."

Sakura looks around in awe, dragging a fingertip across the surgical table.

"The seven years you spend here as a surgical resident will be the best and worst of your life. You will be pushed to the breaking point. Look around you."

Everyone does so.

"Say hello to your competition. Eight of you will switch to an easier specialty. Five will crack under the pressure. Two of you will be asked to leave."

All in the room continue to wander around.

"This is your starting line. This is your arena. How well you play, that's up to you."

Sakura looks at the man whose lab coat read: _Jiraiya._

 _"Like I said, I'm screwed."_

* * *

The new gaggle of interns are all chattering about wildly in the locker room. Sakura is sitting on a long bench as she grabs her stethoscope and wraps it around her neck. She looks around at the rest of the interns.

"Only six women out of twenty," Sakura points out to the woman standing beside her.

The woman responds while shoving her non-work clothes into her locker. "Yeah. I hear one of them's a _model_." She rolls her eyes. "Seriously, that's gonna help with the respect thing?"

"You're Ino, right?" Sakura is cut off by a man yelling for certain interns to report for duty. Not them. Yet.

"Which resident are you assigned to?" Ino asks, throwing on her lab coat and flipping her hair. "I got Mitarashi, Anko."

"The Nazi? Me too," Sakura pouts.

"You got the Nazi?" A third party asks. They both turn in the direction of the voice. "So did I. At least we'll be tortured together, right?"

Sakura smiles weakly, but Ino ignores the man.

"I'm Rock Lee. Uh, we met at the, uh, mixer." His attention is on Sakura, and Sakura alone. "You had on a black dress with a slit up the side, strappy sandals…"

Ino and Sakura exchange a look.

"…and now you think I'm gay. No, I'm not gay—"

Ino starts walking away, leaving Sakura, mumbling an unconvinced "uh-huh."

"It's-it's just that, uh, you were-you were very unforgettable," he stutters.

Sakura simply smiles. She feels bad for him, honestly.

"Lee, Yamanaka, Haruno, Kaze!" The man with the clipboard from earlier calls. Sakura goes running over, leaving a sad Rock Lee behind her.

"And I'm totally forgettable," he mumbles, chasing after her.

"Mitarashi-sama?" Ino asks a man.

"End of the hall," is the reply.

Ino tilts her head to the side. "That's the Nazi?"

Lee comes up from behind. "I thought the Nazi would be a guy."

Sakura chimes in. "I thought the Nazi would be…well, a Nazi."

"Maybe it's professional jealousy." A fourth voice joins. "Maybe she's brilliant and they call her a Nazi because they're jealous." She breaths. "Maybe she's nice." The woman gets ahead of the other three as they walk down the hall to meet the Nazi.

Ino gives her a sidelong glance. "Let me guess. You're the model."

The woman glares at her over her shoulder. She turns back around as she approaches the Nazi.

"Hi, I'm Temari Kaze, but please, just call me Temari."

Anko turned and looked Temari up and down.

 **HOUR ONE**

"I have five rules," she looked at the rest of the interns now. "-memorize them. Rule number one: Don't bother sucking up, I already hate you, and that's not gonna change. Trauma protocol, phone list, pagers," she slaps her hand next all these things. "-nurses will page you. You will answer every page at a run." She walks away from the group. The don't follow. "A run!" They all come running after her. "That's rule number two. Your first shift starts now and lasts 48 hours. You're interns, grunts, nobodies, bottom of the surgical food chain. You run labs, write orders, work every second night until you drop, and don't complain." They enter a small room with bunk beds on both sides of the walls. "On-call rooms. Attendings hog them. Sleep when you can where you can, which brings me to rule number three. If I'm sleeping, don't wake me unless your patient is dying. Rule four: The dying patient better not be dead when I get there. Not only will you have killed someone, but you woke me for no reason. We clear?"

Sakura raises her hand with a wince.

"Yes?" Anko sounds annoyed.

"You said five rules. That was only four."

Anko's pager goes off, her eyes still on Sakura. "Rule number five: When I move, you move." Anko reads the page and begins to jog down the hallway.

"Get out of my way!" She yells before she barrels through another group of interns. They scatter.

Next thing they know, they're on the roof of the hospital as a helicopter comes down with a body. They all shield themselves from the hurricane-like winds the chopper blades produce.

"What do we got?" Anko yells over the drone of the helicopter.

The paramedic gives the lowdown. "Sora Okuma, 15-year-old female, new onset seizures, intermittent for the past week. IV lost en route, started grand mal seizing as we descended."

"All right, get her on her side," Anko commanded once they were in a Trauma room. A few of them grabbed the girl, who was still seizing, and rolled her to her side.

"Temari, 10 milligrams Diazepam IM." Temari searches somewhat frantically.

"A large-bore IV. Don't let the blood hemolyze." Anko stands back to let the interns work, all the while assessing their skills or lack thereof.

"Let's go!" She shouts.

Temari sticks the needle into the patient's lower back causing her to stop seizing immediately.

"A wet fish on dry land?"

Their heads turn. The relieved silence being broken.

"Absolutely, Dr. Inuzuka." Anko hands the doctor the patient's chart.

"Let's shotgun her," he advises as he hands back the chart, stepping back.

"That means every test in the book: CT, CBC, chem-7, tox screen." Anko hands the chart to Ino now.

"Ino, you're on labs. Lee, patient work-ups. Sakura, get Sora for a CT. She's your responsibility now."

"Hai," they all reply and bustle around, getting to work.

"Wait. What about me?" Temari inquires.

Anko turns around, looking her up and down once more. "Honey, you get to do rectal exams." And with that she takes her leave with a smirk on her face. Kami, did she love messing with interns. Especially those who were _models_.

* * *

Ino finds the O.R. Dr. Mitarashi is in, and stares into the window trying to get a glimpse of any and everything she can.

Anko happens to look over and see Ino salivating on the other side of the O.R. door.

She pulls down her mask and opens the door. "What are you doing here?"

"Sora Okuma's labs came out clear. There's nothing in the results that explain her seizures."

"Okay…" Anko starts to close the door. This intern thought _that_ was worth interrupting her during a surgery?

Ino interjects. "Uh, I heard every year, the attending on-call picks the best intern and lets them perform a procedure during the first shift?"

Blank stare.

"I'm just saying it's what I heard."

Anko blinks. "Go away. Now."

* * *

Lee removed the stethoscope from the man's bare back. "Yeah, sounds good."

"He'll be fine?" The wife choked.

"You'll be fine," Lee smiled.

The man leaned back into the bed. "If you don't count the fact that my bacon days are over, sure."

Lee starts writing notes in the man's chart. "So bypass surgery tomorrow with Dr. Inuzuka. I hear he's good. And, after that, you can have all the bacon-flavored soy product you can eat."

"Mmm, kill me now." The man half-smiled.

I wish I could, but…I'm a healer," Lee retorted lightly.

* * *

The elevator bings and opens.

"You're lost," Sora states expressionlessly.

Sakura gives her a blank stare. "I'm not lost." She pushes the bed through the elevator, into the hallway. "How are you feeling?"

"How do you think I'm feeling? I'm missing my pageant."

 _This girl looked sweet but clearly has an attitude._ _Did we not just save her life?_ Sakura scoffed in her head.

"You're missing your pageant?" She decided to say instead.

"The Konoha Teen Miss." Duh. "I was in the top ten after the first two rounds. This is my year. I could have won."

Sakura decides to turn to the right. Nope. Not that way. She turns back the other way, now going left.

"You're so lost. What are you, like, new?"

* * *

Temari squirted the tube of clear gel onto both her index and middle finger. Rectal exams? Really?

She undoes the tie on the man's gown, taking a deep breath. "Okay, so…I'm just gonna insert my fingers i-into your rectum."

* * *

Lee tries to insert the needle into bacon-man's vein.

He inhales sharply. Another miss. He tries again.

Dr. Inuzuka cannot witness this any longer. He slides his gloves on. "Out," he motions to Lee. "Out."

The wife stands with her mouth slightly agape.

"Bet you missed a lot when you first started out," Lee bravely mutters.

Dr. Inuzuka turns his head and blinks. He blows air out of his nose.

* * *

"I twisted my ankle in talent rehearsal," Sora rambles, still being pushed through unknown corridors. "I do rhythmic gymnastics, which is, like, really cool. Nobody else does it."

 _I think I might scream._ Sakura continued to push.

"And I tripped over my ribbon. And I didn't get stuck with someone this clueless." Sora sits up in the moving bed. "…and that was, like, a nurse."

* * *

Dr. Inuzuka opens his mouth to Lee. "You and I are gonna have so much fun together."

Lee shakes his head and sighs.

* * *

 **HOUR SEVEN**

Lee places his food tray on one of the tables in the cafeteria next to his fellow interns.

"This shift is a marathon, not a sprint," he says, shoving food down his throat. "Eat."

"I can't." Temari puts her head in her hands.

"You should eat something."

"You try eating after performing 17 rectal exams. The nazi hates me." Temari sounds as though she's lost all hope, and after only seven hours.

"The nazi's a resident," Lee explains. "I have attendings hating me."

Ino changes the subject. "You know Sakura is inbred?"

Lee responds, mouth full of food. "Like it's uncommon around here to be a doctors' parents—"

"No, like royally inbred." Ino leans in close. "Her mother is Tsunade Haruno."

Temari's eyes widen. "Shut up. _The_ Tsunade Haruno?!"

Lee swallows. "Who's Tsunade Haruno?"

"Tsu?—" Ino starts. Temari snorts. "The Haruno-Method? Where did you go to med school? Kirigakure?"

"She was one of the first big chick surgeons. She's a living legend," Temari adds.

"Yeah, she won the Kato Uzumaki twice," Ino finishes.

Lee looks confused and overwhelmed all at the same time. "So l didn't know _one_ thing."

"Talk about parental pressure," Temari mumbles.

"I'd kill to have Tsunade Haruno as a mother. I'd kill to _be_ Tsunade Haruno. All I need is one good case." Ino shook her head.

Lee looks up to see Sakura moving toward their table. With an apple slice in his mouth he gargles out, "boonmmmbnnm."

Sakura plops down, tray following. "Sora Okuma is a pain in the ass. If I hadn't taken the Hippocratic Oath, I swear I'd—"

The other three just stared at her.

"What?"

Suddenly Dr. Inuzuka appears. "Good afternoon, interns." He rests his hands on his hips, pushing back his lab coat, revealing his dark blue scrubs. "It's posted, but I thought I'd share the good news personally. As you know, the honor of performing the first surgery is reserved for the intern that shows the most promise."

Ino perks up.

"As I'm running the O.R. today, I get to make that choice." He looks around. He then slaps his hand on a nearby shoulder. "Rock Lee."

Lee jumps. "Me?"

Ino glares at Lee.

"You'll scrub in for an appendectomy this afternoon. Congratulations." He nods his departure. "Enjoy."

...

...

...

"Did he say me?"

* * *

"I've seen his file. Rock Lee barely made the cut to get in this program. He's not your guy." Anko and Kiba walk up to the nurse desk, charts in hand.

"He's my guy, all right."

She shakes her head. "Every year, you pick your guy, and your guy suffers more than any other intern."

Kiba signs a piece of paper. "Terrorize one, and the rest fall in line."

I get it! I respect it! But Rock Lee's a puppy," Anko pleads as they now walk down the hall.

"Sora Okuma, 3604?"

"Right there," a nurse points to what seems like two parents.

"Thank you!" They run in. "Sora, honey, Mom and Dad are here." The mother touches her sleeping daughter's cheek.

"They gave her a sedative for the CT scan, so she's a little groggy," Sakura informed the two.

"Will she be all right? Our doctor said that she might need an operation.

Is that true? What kind of operation?" The parents berated Sakura with questions as any caring parents would.

Sakura backs toward the door. "She's, um. Well, you know what? I'm not the doctor." She shakes her head. "Um, I am a doctor, but I'm not Sora's doctor, so I'll go get him for you." She laughs awkwardly. She practically runs into Anko.

" _What._ " Anko grits.

"Sora's parents have questions. Do you talk to them, or do I ask Inuzuka?"

"No, Inuzuka's off the case. Sora belongs to the new attending now, Dr.

Hatake. He's over there." Anko points and then walks away.

Sakura looks around. _UMMM._

Dr. Hatake is laughing with a few colleagues when he spots her. She looks down immediately, turns, and runs away. He throws his clipboard to one colleague and chases after her. He catches up. "Sakura, can I talk to you for a second?"

Without waiting for a response, he grabs her arm and pulls her through a door into the stairwell.

"Dr. Hatake—"

"Dr. Hatake? This morning, it was Kakashi. Now it's Dr. Hatake?"

Sakura breaths. "Dr. Hatake, we should pretend it never happened."

"What never happened? You sleeping with me, or you throwing me out this morning? Because both are memories I'd like to hold onto." Kakashi smiles, but Sakura is not amused.

"No. There will be no memories. I'm not the girl in the bar anymore, and you're not the guy."

Still smiling.

"This can't exist. You get that, right?"

He nods. "You took advantage of me, and you wanna forget."

Sakura scoffs and looks out of a window. "I did not ta—"

"I was vulnerable and good-looking, and you took advantage," Kakashi insists.

Sakura finally cracks a smile. _Dammit._ "I was the one who was drunk, and you are not that good-looking."

"Maybe not today. Last night, I was good-looking. Had my red shirt on, and you took advantage." He walks around her, almost like stalking his prey.

She turns. "I did not take advantage."

He gets close. "Want to take advantage again? Say, Friday night?"

"No. You're an attending and I'm your intern."

…

…

"Stop looking at me like that," she commands.

"Like what?"

"Like you've seen me naked."

He's smiling ear-to-ear now.

"Dr. Hatake. _This_ is inappropriate."

He looks confused.

She starts to walk back to the main hospital. "Has that ever occurred to you?"

 _Sigh._

* * *

Lee paces in the O.R. as the patient is being prepared for the surgery he's scrubbing in on!

"Open, identify, ligate, remove, irrigate, close. Open, identify, ligate, remove, irrigate, close," he mumbles to himself.

"He's gonna faint. A fainter."

"No, code brown, right in his pants."

Two interns go at it as more file into the gallery to watch the appendectomy from above.

"He's gonna sweat himself unsterile."

"Ten bucks, he messes up the McBurney."

"Fifteen, he cries," Ino chimes in as she enters and sits.

"I'll put 20 on a total meltdown," rants another.

"Fifty says he pulls the whole thing off," Sakura retorts, irritated.

All 20 of them in the room turn and stare at her.

She stares back, unafraid". That's one of us down there, the _first_ one of us. Where's your loyalty?"

Ino sits forward. "75 says he can't even ID the appendix."

"I'll take that action," Temari says right away and everyone goes back to chattering.

Sakura just laughs and shakes her head.

"Okay, Lee," Inuzuka walks in. "Let's see what you can do."

"Here it comes," Sakura says to herself.

Everyone is in position. "Scalpel," Lee asks confidently.

He's given the scalpel. The gallery cheers loudly. Inuzuka waves a finger in front of his throat, telling them to knock it off.

Ino smiles. "That Inuzuka is trouble."

Lee places the scalpel onto the patients lower stomach.

"More pressure. The human flesh is a tough shell. Dig in," is Inuzuka's advice.

"Pickups."

…

"Clamp."

A few tense seconds later, "I'm there."

The gallery all exhale a breath they didn't know they were holding. "Damn, he got the peritoneum open. I'm out."

Sakura smiles. "I told you. He's gonna pull it off."

"Scalpel," he orders again.

Lee smiles. "Appendix is out."

The gallery lift their arms up and cheer.

Kiba looks over. "Not bad. Now all you have to do is invert the stump into the cecum and simultaneously pull up on the purse strings, but be careful not to—"

 _Snap._

"…break them."

Gallery: "ooh."

"You ripped the cecum. You've got a bleeder. You're filling with stool. What do you do now?"

"Uh…" Lee has stopped, now just standing with bloody gloves.

"Think," Kiba pushes.

 _Nothing._

Kiba gives him the answer. "You start the suction and you start digging for those strings before she bleeds to death. Give him a clamp," he orders to one of the assistants.

"BP's dropping," the assistant responds.

"He's choking," Ino observes.

Sakura exhales. "Come on, Lee."

" _Today_. Pull your balls out of your back pocket. Let's go. What are you waiting for? Suction," Kiba asserts.

The patient's monitor starts beeping, indicating that her heart rate is plummeting.

"Getting too low, folks," another assistant claims. "Dr. Inuzuka—"

"Get out of the way." Kiba shoves Lee, who's still frozen, behind him. He wanted Lee to do well, but he certainly won't let an intern kill his patient. "Pansy-ass idiot. Get him out of here. Suction. Clamp."

* * *

 **(A/N):** Well hello there! So, if you've read my stories before, you may know that I have written a Naruto-version of a popular movie: Crazy, Stupid, Love. Well, I have taken on an even _more_ ambitious task. That's right, this right here, is the first episode of Grey's Anatomy **BUT** with Naruto characters and in Konoha.

It's a mix of the two, really. The names are the same but it does **NOT** follow the storyline of Naruto.

As you may have noticed, Tsunade is Sakura's mom in this. The good thing about Fanfiction, is that you can do anything and this is what I have decided to do.

I am putting this Chapter out there to see what the response is. Shall I continue? I would like to, but only if people are interested in reading it. I will post Chapter 2 if there's interest. Hope y'all like it; I really do! Let me know!


	2. A Hard Day's Night - Part 2

I do not own Naruto **or** Grey's Anatomy.

All rights go to Masashi Kishimoto and Shonda Rhimes.

* * *

A Hard Day's Night - Part 2

After being shoved from the operating table, Lee looks to the gallery.

"He's 007."

"007, yep."

"A total 007," the gallery rang out.

Temari turned to Sakura. "What's ''007'' mean?"

Sakura, still not taking her eyes from Lee replied, "…License to kill."

And just like that, the gallery began filing out. It was over.

* * *

 **HOUR 19**

"They're calling me 007, aren't they?" Lee asked, rolling around in a wheelchair in the basement of the hospital. The interns liked it down there as there was no noise and they could sleep on the storage gurneys in between pages.

"No one's calling you "007,"" Temari and Sakura said in unison from atop said storage gurney.

"I was on the elevator and Uchiha whispered, ''007."

Ino hopped off her gurney and walked over to a vending machine. ''How many times do we have to go through this, Lee? Five? Ten? Give me a number, or I'm gonna hit you."

He turned the wheelchair. "Uchiha whispered "007", and everyone laughed."

"He wasn't talking about you." Temari stretched.

Lee gave her puppy dog eyes. "Are you sure?"

Sakura chimed in. "Would we lie to you?"

"Yes," was his simple reply.

"007 is a state of mind," Ino called from down the hall a-ways.

"Oh, says the girl who finished first in her class in med school."

Just then a pager began tooting about. They all hesitantly checked to see if it was theirs.

Sakura looked down at hers. "Oh, man. It's 9-1-1 for Sora Okuma." She stills a moment. "I gotta go." She jumps from the gurney and begins running down the hall and up some stairs.

Lee started up again. "Maybe I should have gone into geriatrics. No one minds when you kill an old person." He sounds solemn now.

Ino walks back from the vending machine. "Surgery is hot. It's the Marines. It's macho. It's hostile. It's hardcore." She climbs back onto her gurney and opens a book about surgeries. "Geriatrics is for freaks who live with their mothers and never have sex."

"I've got to get my own place," Lee thinks aloud, shaking his head.

* * *

Sakura came barreling up the stairs to the floor of Sora. She flung the object that was blocking her from her perhaps seizing patient open, and flew to her room. Sakura threw people out of her way once she got to the correct hall. If she were to lose a patient, it would reflect badly on Anko, which meant Sakura would never practice medicine again if Anko had anything to do with it. She braced herself in the doorway of Sora's room, her chest heaving.

"Took you long enough," Sora complained dropping a magazine from her face and onto her lap.

"You're okay? The nurse paged me 9-1-1?!"

"I had to go all Exorcist to get her to even pick up the phone," Sora explained.

Sakura still panting, "Wait. There's nothing wrong with you?"

"I'm bored." Sora was unaffected and unamused.

"You little—I'm not a cruise director."

Sora rolled her eyes. "You don't have to wig out. The pageant's on cable, but this crappy hospital doesn't get the channel. If that cow Emi Marusa is gonna walk off with my crown, I have to see it."

Sakura stared at her in disbelief. "This is an actual hospital. There are sick people here. Go to sleep and stop wasting my time." She started to walk out.

Sora raised her voice. "But I can't sleep. My head's all full."

"That's called ''thinking.'' Go with it." Sakura waived a hand.

* * *

Temari stood motionless in the very mobile main hospital hallway. She had a problem…and there was Anko. Sleeping in the hallway. _Rule number three: If I'm sleeping, don't wake me unless your patient is dying._ Well, her patient wasn't dying but he would be if she didn't get help for a much simpler problem. What to do?

"What do you need?" A male nurse asked, stirring her from her thoughts.

She sighed. "Mr. Kudo has junky veins, and he really needs antibiotics…I should start a central line."

He shrugged. "So start one." She just looked at him. "You don't know how," he guessed.

"I've never done one," she confessed.

"Well, you know what that means." He looked over to a sleeping Anko.

Temari shook her head. "Can't we just page someone else?"

He gave her an all-knowing smile. "She's the on-call resident."

"Okay...okay, I'll just—I'll wake her." Temari mustered up what confidence she could and strode over to the darkly lit hallway.

She bent over the gurney and tapped Anko on the shoulder. "Dr. Mitarashi, I don't mean to bother you—"

"Then don't."

"It's Mr. Kudo—"

"Is he dying?" Anko never once opened her eyes.

"No."

"Then stop talking to me."

Temari stood up straight. She sighed, about to give up. No, she needed help and dammit she was gonna get it. She cleared her throat.

Anko flew up from the gurney. "What is it?!"

Anko started a central line for the man. "Next time you wake me, he better be so close to dead there's a tag on his toe."

* * *

"4-B's got post-op pneumonia. Let's start antibiotics." The man scribbled on the chart.

"Are you sure that's the right diagnosis?" The nurse asked.

"Well, I don't know. I'm only an intern. Why don't you go spend four years in med school and then let me know if it's the right diagnosis?"

He earned a glare from the woman.

He leaned in her face. "She's short of breath. She's got fever. She's post-op. Start the antibiotics."

The nurse walked away, begrudgingly obeying his orders.

"Kami, I hate nurses," he sighed, walking over to Sakura. "I'm Sasuke."

She didn't reply.

"I'm with Jeremy." He looked back at his patient's chart. "You're with the nazi, right?"

"She may not have pneumonia, you know," Sakura offered, lifting a finger. "She could be splinting, or have a P.E."

He smirked. "Like I said, I hate nurses."

Her eyes widened. "What did you just say? Did you just call me a nurse?"

"Well, if the white cap fits." He sounded annoyed now.

Sakura's pager began beeping, interrupting her from plowing this guy's face in. It was Sora again.

"Damn it, Sora," she cursed, walking in the direction of the stairs again.

Lee and another intern walked up to the counter to pick up some charts near Sasuke.

"Is she seeing anybody?" Sasuke asked.

The other intern looked down the hall at an irritated Sakura. "I don't know."

Sasuke whistled. "She's hot." The two exchanged a laugh.

"I'm friends with her," Lee interjected. "I mean, kind of friends. Not actually friends exactly, but we're tight, and we hang out." The other intern laughed and walked away. Lee continued. "Really, only just today—"

"Dude." Sasuke put his hand out. "Stop talking."

* * *

Sakura clomped up the stairs, and lazily opened the stairway door. What does she want this time? A stuffed animal from the gift shop? She was snapped from her thoughts when she saw a multitude of nurses in Sora's room. She began running, full speed.

"What took you so long?" A nurse spat, passing her.

Once she was in the room, she saw Sora seizing as bad, if not worse, than the first time she was admitted. There were multiple nurses attempting to secure her to the bed.

"She's having multiple grand mal seizures," a male nurse informed. "Now, how do you want to proceed?"

Sakura stood there panting. This is for real this time, and she was alone. No resident, no attending.

"Dr. Haruno, are you listening to me?! She's got Diazepam. Two milligrams Lorazepam. I just gave the second dose."

…

…

"Dr. Haruno, you need to tell us what you want to do. Dr. Haruno!"

Sakura finally broke free from her thoughts of anxiety, and grabbed Sora's chart. "Okay, she's full on Lorazepam?"

"Four milligrams," a nurse replied.

Sakura was screaming at herself to think. "You paged Dr. Mitarashi and Dr. Hatake?"

"Lorazepam's not working," the male nurse from before stated. Sora was still having seizure after seizure.

"Phenobarbital," Sakura blurted. "Load her with phenobarbital."

They did as she instructed. "Pheno's in."

They waited. Sora's monitor was still beeping like crazy.

"No change," came another nurse.

"You paged Dr. Hatake," Sakura asked again, still skeptical. Honestly, she just wanted someone to come and save her.

"I just told you."

"Well, page him _again_ , stat."

"What do you want to do? Dr. Haruno, you need to tell us what you want to do." He insisted.

The beeping stopped and was replaced with the flat line tone.

"Heart stopped," the man said.

"Code blue! Code blue! Get the crash cart." The nurses, like ants, all ran around.

Sakura snatched the paddles, and a nurse applied the gel. "Charge the pads to 200."

"Charge," replied the nurse.

"Clear," Sakura said firmly. Guess she was doing this.

Sora's chest flew up to the air in response to the electricity.

They looked to the monitor. "Still v-fib. Nothing."

"Charging. Nineteen seconds?"

Sakura looked back to the nurse. "Charge them to 300."

"300."

"Anything?"

"27 seconds."

"Charge to 360," came another order from Sakura. "Come on, Sora."

"49 seconds."

"At 60 seconds, you're supposed to admin another drug," the man said as if Sakura didn't know.

"Charge again!" They all looked at her like her was out of her mind. "Charge _again,_ " she commanded through gritted teeth.

"Charging."

Sora's chest rose for the third time. They waited. The monitor began beeping normally once more.

"I see sinus rhythm. Blood pressure's coming up," a nurse rang out.

Sakura exhaled for the first time since entering the room. "All right."

"Pressure's returning. Rate's coming back," they continued, almost as if they couldn't believe it.

"What the hell happened?"

Sakura turned to see Kakashi run in. "She had a seizure and her heart stopped."

He ran over to check Sora's breathing. "You were supposed to be monitoring her."

"I checked on her and she—"

Kakashi waived a hand "I got her. Please, just go." _Was he angry?_

"Somebody give me her chart, please," he called to the nurses.

Sakura walked slowly out of the room and into the hallway, her head bowed down to the ground.

Anko came walking up to her. "You get a 9-1-1 , you page me immediately. Not in the five minutes it takes you to get to the emergency. Immediately." Sakura walked past her. "You're on my team and if somebody dies, it's my ass. You hear me? Haruno!"

Sakura pushed her way through a door.

"Sakura?" Ino called out, seeing her walk as if she were a zombie. She was making her way for the door outside.

Once outside, she began running through the rain to a nearby tree and started to gag, eventually vomiting quite a bit. Ino had followed her outside. She looked down at the ground, waiting for Sakura to finish.

Sakura swallowed hard and walked back to enter the hospital. "If you tell anyone, ever..."

Ino let her walk back in without a word.

* * *

 **HOUR 24**

"You said it was a seizure disorder," Mr. Okuma detailed. "Now you're saying it isn't?"

"I'm saying that I don't know," Kakashi admitted.

"What do you think it could be?" The father persisted.

"I don't know."

"When will you?" He was getting aggravated. Upset parents can make an issue and even bigger one.

Kakashi's voice was low. "I don't have an answer. For now, Sora is stable, and—"

"Wait one damn minute." Mr. Okuma put his finger to Kakashi's chest. "We came here because this hospital is supposed to be the best in the Land of Fire." He pointed. "That's my kid in there. _My_ kid. And you have the audacity to stand here and tell me, ''l don't know.""

"Mr. Okuma—"

"No, I want a doctor who knows what they're doing. You get me someone else, better than you."

Kakashi ran a hand through his already disheveled hair. "I am working hard on Sora's case—"

"No, you're not. If you were, you'd be able to give me some answers."

* * *

"I put you on a bypass machine, which pumps blood for your heart. Fix your ticker, take you off the machine, I'm done. Simple procedure," Kiba explained to the bacon-man from earlier.

"So I shouldn't worry?" The man asked.

"I'm very good at what I do. It still is surgery. There are some risks." Kiba wanted to be entirely truthful, because complications can arise at any time for any reason. There are no absolutes in this field.

He smiled. "I'll see you in the O.R. this afternoon, Mr. Morimoto." He then left to attend to other matters before having to scrub for the man's surgery.

Lee walked up.

"You're not gonna leave me alone with that guy, are you?" Mr. Morimoto was a tad frightened by Kiba, even though Lee couldn't find his vein to save his life before, but Lee seemed softer.

"Oh, I'll be outside the O.R. the whole time. Dr. Inuzuka is very good. Don't worry. I'll see you after.

"He'll be fine, right?" His wife was reasonably worried as well.

Lee turned. "He'll sail through. You have nothing to worry about. I promise."

* * *

"What are you doing?" Sakura asked Ino who was messing with a banana in her lap.

"Suturing a banana with the vain hope that it wakes up my brain," she said as if it were obvious.

Lee chuckled.

"What are you smiling at, 007?" Ino poked.

…

…

"I'm sorry. I get mean when I'm tired."

Lee stuck his nose in the air. "You know what? I don't care. I comforted a family, and I get to hang out in the O.R. today. All is well."

Ino sighed. "Does anybody know why we're here?"

All the available interns had been paged to the conference room not too long ago—all unaware of the reason.

"Good morning." Kakashi walked into the room. I'm gonna do something rare for a surgeon." He walked around the table at the center of the room. "I'm gonna ask interns for help." There were murmurs. "I've got this kid, Sora Okuma." Sakura looked away. "Right now, she's a mystery. She doesn't respond to our meds. Labs are clean, scans are pure, but she's having grand mal seizures with no visible cause. She's a ticking clock. She's gonna die if I don't make a diagnosis, which is where you come in. I can't do it alone. I need your extra minds, extra eyes." Temari tied her hair up as if preparing for battle. "I need you to play detective. I need you to find out why Sora's having seizures. "I know you're tired, and have more work than you could possibly handle. I understand, so, I'm gonna give you an incentive. Whoever finds the answer rides with me." He looks at Sakura. "Sora needs surgery. You get to do what no interns get to do: scrub in to assist on an advanced procedure." Ino sat straight up, ready to go and solve not just this mystery, but all the mysteries ever. "Dr. Mitarashi's gonna hand you Sora's chart. The clock is ticking fast. If we're gonna save Sora's life, we do it soon." He took his exit, and all the interns scrambled for the copies of Sora's chart on the table.

* * *

"Did you just page me?" Sasuke drawled.

"Yes. 4-B is still short of breath," the nurse commented.

Sasuke sighed. "Give the antibiotics time to work."

She pressed on. "They should have worked by now."

He opened 4-B's chart. "She's old. She's freaking ancient. She's lucky she's still breathing." He closed it and plopped it into the nurse's arms. "I got a shot to scrub in downstairs on a patient who wasn't alive during the 1st Shinobi War. Don't page me again."

Sakura overheard the conversation and rolled her eyes. Ino spotted her.

"Hey, I want in on Hatake's surgery. You've been the intern on Sora since the start. Want to work together? Find the answer, we have a 50-50 chance of scrubbing in."

They were walking down the hall now.

"I'll work with you, but I don't want in on the surgery," Sakura breathed.

"It's the biggest opportunity any intern will get," Ino explained.

"I don't want to spend any more time with Hatake than I have to."

"What do you have against Hatake?"

"If we find the answer, the surgery's yours." Sakura was serious. "Do you want to work together or not?"

Ino smiled. Sakura's loss was her gain. "Deal."

They had been sitting on the library floor for the past two hours. Open books surrounding them.

"She doesn't have anoxia, renal failure or acidosis. It's not a tumor, her CT's clean," Ino was thinking aloud. "You're not gonna tell me why you won't work with Hatake?"

"No. What about infection?"

Ino flipped through her notes. "No, there's no white count. She has no CT lesions, no fevers, nothing in her spinal tap." She breathed. "Just tell me."

Sakura paused. "…You can't comment, make a face or react in any way." Ino stared at her. "We had sex." She turned to face Ino.

There was silence. Ino opened her mouth, but promptly shut it. Then she opened it again. "What about an aneurysm?"

"No blood on the CT and no headaches." Sakura shook her head.

"There's no drug use, no pregnancy, no trauma….was he good? I mean, he looks like he'd be good."

Sakura stood up. "We're out of answers. What if no one comes up with anything?"

"You mean, what if she dies?"

"Yeah."

"This is gonna sound really bad, but I really wanted that surgery."

"She's just never gonna get the chance to turn into a person. The sum total of her existence will be almost winning Miss Teen whatever. You know what her pageant talent is?" Sakura looked down at Ino who was still on the floor.

"They have talent?" cracked Ino.

"Rhythmic gymnastics."

Ino chuckled. "Oh, come on."

Sakura was smiling now; most likely for the first time since the start of her 48-hour shift. "What is rhythmic gymnastics? I can't even say it, cause I don't know what it is."

The look on Sakura's face changed.

"I think it's something with a ball and a—what? Sakura, what?"

"Get up. Come on."

Sakura and Ino had discussed a few things as they were running through the halls looking for Kakashi.

"The only thing that she would possibly need is an angiogram," Ino started. "Oh, Dr. Hatake! Just a moment."

They reached him just as he was getting into an elevator.

Ino placed her hand on the elevator door to keep it from closing. "Sora competes in beauty pageants."

He looked up. "I know that, but we have to save her life anyway." He went back to looking at a patient's chart.

She began again. "She has no headaches, no neck pain, her CT is clean. There's no medical proof of an aneurysm—"

The elevator started to close but Ino pushed it back open. "—but what if she has an aneurysm anyway?"

Kakashi shook his head. "There are no indicators—"

"Oh, but she twisted her ankle practicing a few weeks ago."

"I appreciate you trying to help…"

Sakura spoke up. "When she twisted her ankle, she fell. It was no big deal, not even a bump on the head. She got up, iced her ankle, and everything was fine. It was a fall so minor, her doctor didn't think to mention it when I was taking her history, but she _did_ fall."

Ino pushed the elevator open again.

"You know what the chance is, that a fall could burst an aneurysm? One in a million, literally," Kakashi pointed out, unconvinced. The elevator door closed. It seemed they lost their case. They started to walk away when the elevator dinged and opened again.

"Let's go," he said, walking past them.

Sakura looked at Ino. "Where?"

"To find out if Sora's one in a million," he replied.

After Sora was scanned once more, and the films were ready, they looked.

Kakashi's mouth was open. "I'll be damned. There it is."

"It's tiny, but it's there," added the Sonographer.

"It's a subarachnoid hemorrhage. She's bleeding into her brain. She could have gone through her entire life without it ever being a problem. One tap in the right spot and—"

"It exploded," Ino finished.

"Now I can fix it." He smiled.

They walked to the main desk.

"You two did great work. Love to stay, but I got to tell Sora's parents she's having surgery. Sora Okuma's chart, please," he asked the nurse behind the counter.

"Here you go."

"Dr. Hatake, you said that you'd pick someone to scrub in if we helped?" Ino croaked.

He looked up. "Oh, yes, right. Um I'm sorry I can't take you both. It's gonna be a full house." He nodded. "Sakura, I'll see you in the O.R."

Ino was still a moment, waiting for Sakura to tell him she didn't want to scrub in, but Sakura didn't say anything. Ino looked behind her at Sakura, who just looked back at her. Kakashi thanked the nurse and walked away to inform the parents. Ino turned and walked the other direction.

"Ino," Sakura called after her.

* * *

Kiba walked out of the O.R. to a waiting Lee.

"Wow, that was quick," Lee beamed.

"His heart had too much damage for a bypass. I had to let him go." He turned on the faucet. "It happens, rarely, but it does happen. The worst part of the game."

Lee was staring through the clear glass that separated the Scrub Room from the O.R. There Mr. Morimoto lay. He had a hard time processing for a moment. "B-But I told his wife—I told her that he would be fine. I promised her that—"

Kiba turned the faucet off, his eyes on Lee's. "You what?"

"They have four little girls—"

"Who the hell are you to promise anything. This is my case. Did you hear me, promise?!" Lee was frozen. "The only one that can keep a promise like that, is Kami-sama himself, and I haven't seen him holding a scalpel lately. You never promise a patient's family a good outcome!"

"I thought—"

"You think you're important enough to make promises to Mrs. Morimoto?" He points. "You get to be the one to tell her that she's a widow." Kiba slams his way out of the Scrub Room, leaving a withering Lee.

* * *

Temari opens her mouth to speak to a pouting Ino.

"Temari, don't."

"Maybe Sakura couldn't—"

"Temari."

Sakura walks in to where the other two are sitting. "I'll tell him I changed my mind."

Ino waives a hand. "Don't do me any favors. It's fine. You did a cutthroat thing. Deal with it. Don't come to me for absolution. You want to be a shark, be a shark."

"I'm not—"

"Oh, yes you are. Only it makes you feel bad in your warm, gooey places. No, screw you. I don't get picked for surgeries 'cause I slept with my boss, and I didn't get into med school 'cause I have a famous mother. Some of us have to earn what we get." Ino continued to peel at the label of the water bottle that was in her hands.

Sakura turned around and walked out.

* * *

Lee peaked his way into the waiting room. He spotted Mrs. Morimoto and two other family members, it seemed. He sighed.

The family stood when they saw Lee.

"Mrs. Morimoto, there were complications in the surgery. Your husband's heart had a lot of damage. We tried to take him off bypass, but there wasn't anything we could have done."

She shook her head. "What are you talking about?"

"Your husband died. He's dead."

Her face is blank.

"Mrs. Morimoto I-I am so sorry—"

"Thank you." She stuck a hand out for him to not come any closer.

He did anyway.

"Please go away," she shrieked.

He did so as the woman cried out loudly. He couldn't help the guilt and remorse that hit him like a train.

* * *

 **HOUR 40**

Sakura walked in a room to see Kakashi shaving Sora's head in preparation for surgery.

He looked up at her. "I promised I'd make her look cool. Apparently, being a bald beauty queen is the worst thing that happened in the history of the world."

"Did you choose me for the surgery because I slept with you?" Sakura asked, getting right to the point. Her arms were crossed.

"Yes." He rolled over to the other side of Sora to get a better angle.

"I'm kidding," he huffed, once he realized she was serious.

Sakura leaned up against the door frame. "Im not gonna scrub in for surgery. You should ask Ino. She really wants it."

"You're Sora's doctor. And on your first day, with little training, you helped save her life. You earned the right to follow her case through to the finish." He looks around Sakura, to the people within earshot. His voice is low. "You shouldn't let the fact that we had sex get in the way of you taking your shot."

* * *

It was night now, and both Sakura and Lee were sitting outside getting some much needed fresh air.

"I wish I wanted to be a chef or a ski instructor or a kindergarten teacher," Sakura spoke.

"You know, I would have been a really good postal worker," Lee added. "I'm dependable."

Sakura giggled.

"You know, my parents tell everyone they meet that their son's a surgeon…as if it's a big accomplishment. Superhero or something. If they could see me now."

Sakura looked at him. "When I told my mother I wanted to go to medical school, she tried to talk me out of it. Said I didn't have what it takes to be a surgeon, that I'd never make it. So the way I see it, superhero sounds pretty damn good."

Lee lifted one corner of his mouth into a weak smile. "We're gonna survive this, right?"

* * *

"She's still short of breath. Did you get an ABG or a chest film?" The Chief of Surgery, Jiraiya, asked.

"Oh, yes, sir, I did," Sasuke nodded.

"And what did you see?"

"I had a lot of patients last night," was Sasuke's only response.

Sakura wasn't too far away and just couldn't believe this guy.

Jiraiya, hands now on his hips said, "name the common causes of post-op fever."

"Uh, yes." Sasuke dipped into his lab coat for his index cards.

"From your head, not from a book. Don't look it up. Learn it. It should be in your head." He asked again. "Name the common causes of post-op fever."

"Uh the common causes of post—"

"Can anybody name the common causes of post-op fever?" He yelled so the whole floor could hear him. Many interns pulled out their notes.

"Wind, water, wound, walking, wonder drugs. The five W's. Most of the time, it's wind, splinting or pneumonia." Jiraiya walked toward her. "Pneumonia's easy to assume, especially if you're too busy to do the tests." She looked at Sasuke. He glared at her.

"What do you think's wrong with 4-B?" Jiraiya knew she would know.

"The fourth W, walking. Ithink she's a prime candidate for a pulmonary embolus."

"How would you diagnose?" He prodded.

"Spiral CT, VlQ scan, provide O2, dose with heparin and consult for an lVC filter."

Jiraiya tunred around to face Sasuke. "Do exactly as she says, then tell your resident that I want you off this case."

Sasuke nodded.

Jiraiya walked back over to Sakura. "I'd know you anywhere. You're the spitting image of your mother. Welcome to the game."

* * *

Sakura walked into the O.R. after scrubbing in.

Kakashi looked at her. "All right, everybody. It's a beautiful night to save lives. Let's have some fun."

 _I can't think of any one reason why I want to be a surgeon, but I can think of 1,000 reasons why I should quit._

Sakura observes as Kakashi operates, as the assistants bustle around, doing certain tasks, all for the same goal: saving Sora's life.

 _They make it hard on purpose. There are lives in our hands. There comes a moment when it's more than just a game_

Kakashi motions for Sakura to come over and take a look at what he's doing. She peers into one of the microscopes pointed at Sora's brain. Sakura looks up and smiles at Kakashi, who returns her smile with an even bigger one.

 _-and you either take that step forward or turn around and walk away. I could quit, but here's the thing I love the playing field._

* * *

 **HOUR 48**

Ino walks out of the gallery to find a sitting Sakura.

"It was a good surgery," Ino admits.

"Yeah."

"We don't have to do that thing where I say something and then you say something, and then somebody cries, and there's a moment," Ino drones.

"Yuck."

"Good," Ino looks at Sakura. "You should get some sleep. You look like crap."

Sakura looks at Ino now. "I look better than you."

"That's not possible," Ino replies as she gets up and leaves.

Kakashi walks out, placing the chart on the counter of the nurse's station. Sakura looks at him. "That was amazing."

"Hmm."

"You practice on cadavers, you observe and you think you know what you're gonna feel like standing over that table, but…that was such a high. I don't know why anybody does drugs."

His expression softens. "Yeah."

She looks down, not able to hold eye contact any longer. "Yeah."

He shakes his head and smiles. "I should, uh, go do this." His voice is gentle.

"You should." She nods.

"I'll see you around."

"See you around."

 _So, I made it through my first shift. We all did. The other interns are all good people. You'd like them I think. I don't know, maybe. I like them._

Sakura leaves the hospital and drives to the care home. Once inside, a receptionist points in a direction. Sakura thanks her.

 _Oh, and I changed my mind. I'm not gonna sell the house. I'm gonna keep it. I'll have to get a couple of roommates, but it's home, you know?_

"Are you the doctor?"

"No. I'm not your doctor, but I am a doctor." Sakura smiles.

The lady fidgets in her seat. "What's your name?"

"It's me, Mom. Sakura." They were sitting in a sitting-room of sorts. It looked like a study.

"All right." She nods. "I used to be a doctor, I think."

Sakura grabs her mother's hand. "You were a doctor, Mom. You were a surgeon."

* * *

 **A/N:** If you've made it through the first Chapter, thank you so much! I hope you are enjoying what you've read so far. And if you do, please do not hesitate to tell me so, whether that be a review, follow, or favorite. I will be waiting to start on Chapter 2 until further response from a majority of people.

Again, thank you so much for reading! ^^


	3. The First Cut is the Deepest - Part 1

**I do not own Naruto or Grey's Anatomy**

 **All rights go to Masashi Kishimoto and Shonda Rhimes.**

* * *

 **A/N:** Just some information going into this chapter regarding this "story" as a whole. There will be many references to real world things; however, these characters are in the Naruto world. It's almost like a crossover of sorts. So be prepared for that. There's definitely a bit of both worlds here for sure. I didn't want to confuse anyone, so I suppose this is a disclaimer.

Peds = abbreviation for Pediatrics which is working with children, including babies.

Thank you for your time!

 **A/N 2:** I apologize for the misspellings and or grammatical errors. Hopefully all have since now been fixed. I will do my best next time to be more careful. This chapter was indeed put together quite hastily.

* * *

Sakura pushed the door open to the intern locker room, paper in hand. She swung her purse over her shoulder and pinned the paper to a nearby cork board.

 ** _Roommates Wanted_**

 _"_ _It's all about lines. The finish line at the end of residency. Waiting in line for a chance at the operating table. And then there's the most important line—the line separating you from the people you work with. It doesn't help to get too familiar. To make friends. You need boundaries between you and the rest of the world. Other people are far too messy. It's all about lines. Drawing lines in the sand and praying like hell no one crosses them."_

"Look, I'm sure you're very nice, but I'm very particular about who lives in my house," Sakura explained sitting across from another intern in the hospital's waiting room. "You're just not right."

"Why? Look, I'm quiet," the female moved to sit next to Sakura, grabbing her arm. "No loud music, no parties."

"Where were you when Orochimaru invaded Konoha and killed the Third Hokage?"

The woman was confused. "Who?"

"Orochimaru."

"Uh, I think I was in the Academy still…?"

Sakura smiled. "Exactly." She stood. "No."

* * *

"Why put up posters if you don't want roommates?" Temari asked a pacing Sakura.

"I do want roommates. We're together 100 hours a week. You want to live together too?"

Ino walked up and spotted the coffee in Sakura's grasp. "I see you bring bribes now, huh?"

Lee got within inches of Sakura's face. "I need a place to live. My mom irons my scrubs. I have to get out of there."

Sakura looked past Lee to Ino. "It's not a bribe," she stared at Lee now. "I don't think it's a good idea."

"It's totally a bribe," Ino rolled her eyes.

Temari interjected. "I can cook, and I'm an obsessive cleaner."

"No. I just want two total strangers who I don't have to talk to or be nice to." Sakura spotted Anko who was walking out of a nurses station. "And it's not a bribe. It's a mocha latte."

The interns scurried to Anko for their assignments. "Lee, run the code team. Sakura, take the trauma pager. Ino, deliver the labs to the patients. Temari, you're on sutures." Anko turned to walk the flight of stairs.

Sakura hurried after her. "Dr. Mitarashi, I was hoping to assist you in the O.R. today. Maybe do a minor procedure. I think I'm ready." She jutted her arm out. "Mocha latte?"

"If she gets to cut, I want to cut," Ino said in a everything-needs-to-be-fair type of way.

"Me too," Temari nodded.

"I wouldn't mind another shot," Lee answered honestly. "I mean, if everybody else is."

Anko put her hand up to silence them. "Stop talking. Every intern wants to perform their first surgery. That's not your job. Do you know what your job is? To make your resident happy. Do I look happy? No. Why? Because my interns are whiny. You know what will make me look happy? Having the code team staffed, having the trauma pages answered, having the weekend labs delivered and having someone down in the pit doing the sutures." She snatched the coffee from Sakura and tramped up the stairs. "No one holds a scalpel till I'm so happy I'm Mary-freakin'-Poppins."

"Mocha latte, my ass," Ino mumbled.

Anko looked down. "Why are you all still standing there? Move!"

* * *

Sakura, paperwork in hand walked over to the elevator. She observed that there was a certain annoying pest near it. Her back to him, she waited patiently for the _ding_.

"Konoha has ferryboats."

Sakura tried to keep a smile off her face. "Yes?"

"I didn't know that. I've been living here six weeks. I didn't know there were ferryboats."

"The ocean borders the Land of Fire." Sakura still didn't turn around to face him.

"Hence the ferryboats," he looked up from his phone. "Now I have to like it here."

The elevator _dinged_.

"I wasn't planning on liking it here."

Sakura stepped inside the elevator. He followed her.

"I'm from the Land of Lightning. I'm genetically engineered to dislike everywhere."

Sakura pressed a button, and the doors began to slide closed.

"I have a thing for ferryboats," he continued.

Sakura was standing behind him now. She stared at his back. Letting out a sigh she said, "I'm not going out with you."

He turned his head. "Did I ask you to go out with me?"

He had a point. Maybe she was jumping to conclusions?

He smirked. "Do you want to go out with me?"

Then again, maybe she wasn't.

"I'm not dating you, and I'm definitely not sleeping with you again. You're my boss."

He looked up at the ceiling of the elevator. "I'm your boss's boss."

"You're my teacher and my teacher's teacher. And you're my teacher," she circled.

''I'm your sister, I'm your daughter," Kakashi mumbled.

"You're sexually harassing me."

"I'm riding an elevator."

"Look, I'm drawing a line. The line is drawn," she huffed. "There's a big…line."

Silence.

"So, this line, is it imaginary?" He turned around now, facing her for the first time since their last encounter in the stairwell. "Or do I need to get you a marker?"

 _Damn._

Sakura dropped all the files in her hands and kissed him so hard he fell back into the wall. He reciprocated her fervent kisses, but switched them so that now she was against the wall.

The elevator continued to ding at each floor it rose to, unbeknownst to the two lovers.

As the elevator shook and began to open, Sakura broke the kiss and immediately gathered the strewn about files and hurried out. More people filled in with Kakashi.

He called out. "We'll talk later?"

* * *

Sakura arrived at the room she was paged to moments ago.

"Are you the surgeon?" a nurse asked.

"Yeah," Sakura entered the room and pulled some gloves out to put on.

"We've got a rape victim. 25-year-old female found down at the park. Status: post-trauma. She came in with a GCS of six. BP: 80 over 60. Exam is significant for blunt head trauma. Unequal breath sounds, right pupil is dilated. And she's ready for X-ray. Ready to roll?"

Sakura stared a moment too long. This young woman was in bad shape, and that was just on the outside. Who knows what kind of damage was done on the inside.

"Hey!"

She broke from her trance. "Yeah. Call ahead to clear CT. Let them know I'm coming. Load up the portable monitor. Call Respiratory for a ventilator. I'll get x-rays while I'm down there."

"I'll get the vent," a nurse offered.

* * *

"She's going to spend a hell of a long time in recovery and rehab," Kakashi said faintly as he concentrated on the woman's brain.

"If she survives," Kiba pointed out.

Kakashi looked up from the victim on his operating table. "She's what? 5'2'', 100 pounds? And she's breathing after what this guy did? Catch the guy, they should castrate him."

"See how shredded her hands are? She tried to fight back." Kiba continued to work on the damage to her insides.

"Tried? Rape kit came back negative." Kakashi shook his head. "She kicked his ass."

Kiba nodded. "So we have a warrior among us, huh?"

They both chuckled.

Sakura, who was scrubbing in on the surgery, but mainly observing piped up. "Hana."

Everyone in the O.R. looked at her now.

She tried not to waiver. "Her name is Hana."

Kakashi nodded solemnly in acknowledgment. "Hana."

Kiba continued to 'dig.' "I think I may have found the cause of our rupture." He sticks his hand out. "Large hemostat. More suction." He pulls a bloody object from the woman. "What is this? Does anyone know what this is?"

Sakura's eyes widen. "Oh, kami."

Kiba turns his head. "What? Spit it out, Haruno."

"…She bit it off."

"Bit off what?"

"That's h-his penis."

The whole operating room groans.

"She bit off his penis," Sakura repeats.

Kiba throws the…penis along with the hemostat/clamps into a bowl in disgust.

* * *

Kiba and Kakashi wash up in the Scrub Room after Hana's surgery. "Ouch!" They both exclaim.

"If she can fight the infection, she'll be fine," Kiba noted.

Kakashi was drying off his hands and arms. "It's all gonna depend on whether or not she wakes up in the next 72 hours."

Kiba did the same. "We should get a drink later. You can tell me the long story of what makes a hot shot doc leave the great Land of Lightning for Konoha."

Kakashi tossed the paper towel in the trash and grabbed a chart. "Short story, actually. Your chief of surgery made me an offer I couldn't refuse."

Kiba smiled confusedly. "Jiraiya asked you to come?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"Oh, nothing."

Kakashi nodded and opened the door to the exit. "See you later."

* * *

Lee, elbows on the counter leaned over to Ino. "Do you know what the code team does? Saves lives. I shock a heart, and someone lives to see another day. That's upbeat. It's, uh, glass half full."

Ino closed her chart. "Bambi, don't say another word till after the hunter shoots your mother."

"I don't like you."

"I have gotten a BA, a PhD and an MD, and I'm delivering lab results. It will take all day to get through these."

"Then get started," Anko replied from out of nowhere.

Ino whipped around. "Oh, I-I wasn't complaining—"

Anko didn't care what her excuses were. "Intern was reassigned, so he's mine now. Have him shadow you for the day. Show him how I do things."

"Sasuke Uchiha, nice to meet you," he smiled fakely.

Ino blinked. "You're the pig who called Sakura a nurse. I hate you on principle."

They began walking down the hall.

"And you're the pushy, overbearing kiss-ass. I, uh, hate you too."

"Oh, it should be fun then."

Lee watched them walk away just as his pager went off. He ran his way to the room where a patient was coding, in distress.

"I'm Dr. Lee. I'll be running this code. What do we got?"

"We have a 57-year-old male. He's asystole."

"Charging to 200, please."

"We're charged."

"Clear."

* * *

"All right, Mrs. Lu, I'm Dr. Kaze. I'm gonna sew up your wound." Temari gently turned the woman's wrist for a better look.

"Yeah, you're gonna need about six stitches. Are you allergic to any medication?"

[speaking Chinese]

"Oh, I'm sorry. I-I don't…Do you speak English?

[speaking Chinese]

"I'll find, um, does anybody here speak Chinese?" Everyone who was in the pit just gave her a blank stare.

* * *

Sakura knocked lightly on the chief's door. It opened slightly.

"Hi. Is the chief in?"

"He's on his way," a lady said sitting in a chair off to the side. "Is that it?" She looked at the red icebox in Sakura's grasp.

"Yeah."

"Can I see it? "

Sakura raised an eyebrow.

"No," she waived her hand. "Forget I asked."

"Sakura, it's good to see you," Jiraiya stepped in. "I heard your mother was leaving the Suna clinic and going back to work for the elders?"

"She's, uh, taking time off."

Jiraiya nodded. "To write another book, I suppose."

Sakura changed the subject. "So they said to bring this to you, so..."

"Yes, uh, for the police."

"Right."

"When did the police say they were coming?" He asked the other lady in his office.

"You know how slow they are. She better take it with her."

"What?"

"You have to take it with you."

Jiraiya sat down in his chair. "Chain-of-custody rules. All medical matter in a rape must stay with the person who collected it until it's placed in police custody."

"You collected the specimen, so you have custody," the lady smiled.

Sakura's face was blank. "Custody of a penis."

"Yes, until the cops come for it."

"Okay. Well, what am I supposed to do with the penis?"

Jiraiya and Sakura just stared at each other. Awkward.

* * *

"You have a disorder called multinucleate cell angiohistiocytoma," Ino droned to a patient and their family. "It's not a cancer or sarcoma. It's very rare but minor. You'll be discharged today, okay?"

"I-I don't need a surgery?" The man in the hospital bed croaked.

"No."

"I'm not gonna die? I'm fine?"

"Fit as a fiddle, or whatever." Ino's eyes widened as the mother came barreling toward her in tears, arms wide open.

* * *

Sakura set her penis on the counter (her penis in _custody_ that is).

The noise caused Lee to look up. "What's that?"

"Don't ask. You don't want to know," she muttered.

"I do want to know," his eyes were as big as saucers now. "Really."

"You really want to know?"

He nodded emphatically.

"It's a severed penis," she beamed a smile.

"Okay…I didn't really want to know."

* * *

"Why do l have to be the one who get hugged?" Ino cringed.

"Because I don't do that. Besides, you're the ovarian sister here," Sasuke pointed out in a monotone voice.

"Did you call me an ovarian s—? An ovarian s—? Since when has the possession of ovaries become an insult?" She leaned up against a door frame joined by her well known fellow interns.

Lee sighed. "Sakura's carrying a penis around in a jar."

Ino perked up. "Oh, from the rape surgery?"

"Yeah, and it's not a jar. It's a cooler," Sakura reiterated.

Ino opened the lid and closed it quickly. "Talk about taking a bite out of crime."

"You okay?" Lee saw what seemed to be a mopey Sakura.

"Yeah…Hana's shoes are—"

"What?"

"The rape victim, Hana, her shoes…I have the same ones in my locker, and I normally never wear them because they're not comfortable, but today I did. And she was wearing the same shoes, and it's just stupid, and I'm tired, and forget it." She looked back down at her mounds of paperwork.

"You know what you need?"

She looked up.

He smirked.

"No."

He nodded.

"It's sick and twisted. We said last time was the last time."

He looked away as if caught.

"You've been doing it without me?"

He got closer to her. "You can't just say no. Come on," he pleaded.

"Do you know what would happen if anyone knew?"

"I'm doing it. You can come with me, or you can stay here and be miserable."

Sakura giggled.

* * *

Lee murmured a constant stream of baby noises. "Who's the little boy in the yellow hat? You are, yes you are."

Sakura laughed. "You are such a woman."

Her and Lee would occasionally sneak away to the pediatric ward and stare at the all the newborn babies. It was a place of zero stress and nothing but cute babies.

Lee's pager started to beep. "That's a code. I gotta go."

Sakura turned her attention back to the chubby babies. "You are really cute." Her attention was caught by a particular baby who wouldn't stop crying. _What the?_ Sakura wasn't sure if she was seeing correctly, but he was certainly turning blue. She found her way in the room, set down the penis once more, and began listening to the baby's chest.

Just then a pediatric doctor walked in. "What are you doing in here?"

"There were no tests ordered, and the baby has a murmur."

"I know."

"He turned blue," Sakura persisted.

The woman looked at Sakura's lab coat. "You're surgery, you're not authorized to be in here. Do you know how much trouble you can get into?"

"Are you going to do any tests?"

"It's a benign systolic ejection murmur. It goes away with age."

"So you're not gonna do tests."

"He's not your patient. He's not even on your service."

"Are you sure it's benign?"

The woman was becoming exasperated. "I'm a doctor, too, you know." She opened the door to the main hallway. "You should get out of here."

Sakura glared at her, took the penis, and left.

* * *

"Chief," Kiba said warmly as he saw Jiraiya walking in his direction. "So, you asked Hatake to come to Konoha, huh?"

"He was an old student of mine." They walked together now.

"He left a private practice in Lightning country because you asked."

Jiraiya stopped and folded his arms. "Yes?"

"No other reason? Just a favor for an old professor?"

Jiraiya knew what Kiba was getting at. "It'll be years before I retire."

"Chief of Surgery is mine." Kiba was no longer being coy.

"It was yours. Now I'm not so sure."

"I am the best surgeon in this hospital, with the lowest mortality rate. You can't just bring—"

"Now ask me why I'm not so sure about you," Jiraiya interrupted. "Ask me why."

Kiba huffed and walked away.

* * *

"Don't people get sick anymore?" Ino leaned back on the empty gurney next to Sasuke who was still shadowing her.

Sasuke pinched the bridge of his nose. "I mean, how are we supposed to get any O.R. time if everyone's gonna just live?"

Ino began separating her files. "Look. I'll take ten, you take ten. Get in, get out. No smiling, no hugging, no letting them cry. Just be quick about it."

They both leaped off the gurney.

"You're the one that's slow," he retorted.

"I am not slow. You are slow."

"You want to bet?

"You're on."

Ino and Sasuke ran around like chickens with their head cut off, trying to get through their patients as fast as possible. At least until, one of them had something interestingly wrong with them. But of course, everyone was perfectly healthy and able to be discharged. Much to their dismay.

* * *

"What's your favorite '80s group?" Sakura was still on the hunt for roommates when she wasn't, you know, trying to illegally save babies and such.

"Queen," one intern answered.

"No."

"Twisted Sister," came another.

Sakura got up to leave.

"Oh, it's not like there's a right or wrong answer," one said.

"The Go-Go's, Duran Duran, Eurythmics," Sakura muttered giving examples as she walked away.

* * *

Unlike Sasuke and Ino, Lee's patients weren't doing so well.

"Time of death: 15:45."

* * *

"Sakura, I've called every hospital in the area. I don't know. Sooner or later, the guy that did this is gonna seek medical attention. When he does, that penis you're carrying is going to nail him." Kakashi tried reassure her.

"Where is her family?"

"Doesn't have any." Kakashi checked Hana's vitals.

"No siblings?"

"No. Both parents are dead. She just moved to Konoha three weeks ago. Welcome to the city." He walked out of the room to the nurses counter to fill in Hana's chart. After a few silent moments from Sakura, he spoke again. "Sakura, are you okay?"

She didn't take her eyes of Hana. "Yeah, I'm fine. I just have to do something. I have to go."

He walked back into the room. "All right. I'm going to sit with her."

Sakura hunted down Kiba. "Dr. Inuzuka? There's a baby up in Peds. I saw him have a tet spell, and I think I hear a murmur."

"Hmm. Did Peds call us for a consult?"

"No, but they're not—"

"So, you want me to what?"

"If you could just go up and look at him."

"Not without a Peds consult. I'm a busy man, Haruno, and there are rules. Look, it's not like I'm the chief or something."

* * *

"You're hot," breathed an inebriated patient right in Temari's face.

"You're drunk. Hold still."

"Wait," he smiled crookedly. "You're that that girl from the magazine. The red bikini."

Temari sighed. "Yeah, it was pink. I'm done. You can see the nurse outside now."

[speaking Chinese]

"Please sit down. I really need to look at your arm, okay?" Temari still hadn't found anyone who spoke Chinese to translate for her, and the woman wouldn't let Temari touch her.

[speaking Chinese]

* * *

Ino approached Sakura who was sitting in the waiting area near the front entrance of the hospital. "What are you doing down here?"

"Just sitting here with my penis. What about you?"

"Hiding from Sasuke."

Sakura looked away. "I kissed Kakashi."

"You kissed Kakashi?"

"In the elevator."

"In the elevator?"

"I was having a bad day. I am having a bad day."

"This is what you do on your bad days, make out with Dr. McDreamy." Ino rolled her eyes.

"Well, you know," Sakura pointed. "-that, and carrying around a penis just makes everything seem so shiny and happy."

Ino opened her bag of chips she'd hidden away. "Lee said Hana was wearing your shoes."

"Yeah. It's weird, right?"

"It's weird that you care." Ino continued to munch.

"Well I think it's weird."

They both turned their heads to look out the window as they both heard a man yelling. They saw him staggering toward the entrance just before he collapsed. They ran outside along with many others. When they flipped him over, they were alarmed to see his pants covered in blood.

Once the man was admitted, Sakura got on the hospital phone. "Could I have security, please?"

Anko, who was paged, arrived. "What do we got?"

"Take a look."

Anko lifted the thin blanket covering the unconscious man on the gurney. "Let's get him to O.R. 1. Call the chief. Let him know we got the rapist."

* * *

"I saw Hana. You can't believe the beating that she took," Sakura told Ino through her mask as they stood in the O.R. "And then to see this."

"Like that saying, '''You should see the other guy,''' Ino added.

"Why not attempt to reattach the severed penis?" Anko asked as a teaching moment.

Ino spoke. "Teeth don't slice. You can only reattach with a clean cut. If she wanted to slice him off with a knife…"

"Plus," Sakura said. "The digestive juices didn't leave much of the flesh."

Anko nodded. "Right, so, what do we do?"

"Sew him up minus a large part of the family jewels."

"And his outlook?"

"He'll be urinating out of a bag for a very long time," Sakura answered.

"Not to mention he'll never be able to have sex again," Ino muffled.

"Oh, too bad," Sakura sarcastically clutched her chest.

"Shame."

"Let's all take a moment to grieve," Anko added. "Clamp."


End file.
